Things that make me go hmmm....

I've been gone for a minute.. life happens and it surely never fails to offer more ignorance to exploit. This may not be one of the funny blogs about light skinned people that you've grown accustomed to but excuse me while I clear my throat...

1. Where are all the good women hiding?

So.. I went out to a bar this past weekend to watch my gf slurp down a few strawberry mojito's. We're chillin, shooting the breeze when Ebony and Ivory sitting next to us try to get our attention. Ivory states that he's recently divorced.. for the third time and walks away. I'm thinking 'perfect.. now we have more room at the bar.' Wrong. Ebony decides to slide on over and start talking pure unadulterated drunk babble. Our biggest mistake was entertaining this fool. He's just talking, talking, and talking but then toward the end of his soliloquy he decides to buy us a drink before we leave. He called it a parting gift for us being so "nice." Wonderful. Payment for our torture of his spitlaced Ebonics. So we drink this so called 'Pink Punani' (*don't ask*) and after a few more minutes we ask the bartender for our check. Note: This is where it gets good. This boy looked amazed when we both pulled out our credit cards to split the tab. Not because we weren't arguing over the bill but because we were paying it to begin with. In his most dumbstruck voice (which, by the way, wasn't hard for him to achieve) he goes, "see... y'all are some dumb b*tches..." SAY WHAT NOW?? My shots of cranberry juice were the only things keeping me sane at that moment so I had to ask what he meant. His soliloquy started again.. He said we were dumb because we hadn't walked out on our bill or said our tab was on him. This made me pause. Was this dude serious? It was so disheartening when I realized that he was. He sat there and tried to "school" us on how to play men. But wait.. Isn't that ungood? Why would I want to play a guy and stick him with a tab that wasn't his. Then when he found out that we had real jobs and were in school AND had no kids he was flabbergasted. This fool even had the nerve to say something about "our kind" existing. Our kind? You mean, the kind that are on a career path, trying to make something of themselves? Is that the kind he was referring to. What made it worse is when he asked if we paid our own bills too. Now, you know what.. enough was enough. Is this the reality for men? Has it gotten so bad that the real women can't even be found anymore? Is that why when a guy finds a real woman he doesn't know how to hold on to her, because he doesn't know what one looks or feels like? I'm perplexed but I will tell you that I walked out of that restaurant deeply saddened.

2. When did fake become the new real?

Fake boobs. Fake a**es. Fake friends. Can someone please tell me when this became the norm? I missed the memo.

3. If you don't have anything nice to say...

Sit down and shut up. I'm tired of bitter, insecure people putting down or getting in the way of others just because they're unhappy with themselves. As much as people have irked me, what would it benefit me to sit down and waste time talking about them? They're obviously doing something right if you have their names in your mouth so start checking yourself on who and what you're parting your lips about because who looks dumber.. the person spreading someone else's business or the person who made a mistake while creating business for you to talk about?


That's all for now...